Last Updated on 6 months Assertiveness is little like Motivation that is built by the nurturing yourself. People feel they should be assertive or that they are not assertive just enough. Many people want to build assertiveness skills but they not quite sure what Assertiveness really is.
Many times, People feel they are assertive about something but in reality they just conflict between aggressiveness and assertiveness. In real words, they don’t really mean it.
What is assertiveness in the real world??
” Assertiveness is probably defined as expressing, feelings, opinions, and thoughts in a non-defensive way – clearly or openly. ”
In a simple manner, Assertion does not mean being heavy-handed, dogmatic, boring or being arrogant.
This sounds simple, but in the real world, in reality, many people experience intricate in refusing others’ demands as well as in communicating with friends, companions or even at the workplace.
Assertiveness covers communication in a way that takes other people’s feelings and exhilaration. It also has an expression of self-confidence.
If you have own business and want to develop assertiveness “Of course you want that why you are here” you must read the law of motivation at the workplace first!!
Assertiveness reflects your habitual ways of thinking and as well as your relationships with others.
What is assertiveness in a sentence ??
It is being able to make requests and to refuse requests that are not acceptable.
Remember; Empathy has to play a major role in being assertive.
Balancing between empathy and the way of expressing your opinions and feeling is so much important. Remember, you may be right, but equally, you may be wrong.
9 Solid Steps to build assertiveness skills
Here are ways to build assertive communication skills;
- Expect to be anxious
- Build your self-confidence
- Believe in yourself more than anyone
- Watch and listen to what others communicate to you
- Consider the situation
- Plan your response action
- Make your point clearly
- Say No nicely
- Be positive
Let’s dive in each of them;
1. Expect to be anxious
When people try to say their feelings or thinking clearly, they might feel anxious. If any individual honestly says they never feel anxious, they must have no understanding, empathy or feeling about anyone else. It is okay to feel anxious when you utter your feelings or your thinking to anyone else.
Your anxious feeling is totally acceptable so don’t be embarrassed. This is the first step to become assertive in communication. You might beat more challenges in the future.
2. Build your self-confidence
Confidence is like a habit – Bad habits take time to develop and are created by continual practice of its and repetition until at some stage they become hard to eliminate. But they do take time to develop fully. As same good habits are. They take time to form and must be continually Practised. It is easy to develop this productive habit.
There are 5 Simple steps to build self-confidence.
Get rid of Excuses
Use Picture Power
Don’t fear of failure
Consider your strong appearance
Keep records of your past success.
We will look more Brief in our next blog. So keep sets tune. Don’t get your self in the nervous zone.
As Chines Proverb;
3. Believe in yourself more than anyone
You must believe in yourself first in any Circumstances. What that means by me; You must watch and listen to your narration and negotiation with yourself. You must be yourself in a positive way. You must use and repeat “I can do it!” Affirmation when you are free. You must follow your instincts and If you are in business you must break your fear of failure. It means you must believe in your self.
Believing yourself means having pride and confidence in yourself. Believing in yourself is also mean thinks positive. When you start to believing in yourself you’ll start to establish trust for Yourself, and if you have the trust for yourself you will start making good decisions. This is the key point for this step.
Having belief in yourself also means to overcome whatever you are facing, whether they are goals, fears, or anything. Here, simple Laws of Belief that might helps you to build to believe in your self.
4. Watch and listen to what others communicate to you
Here “Watch” means, be aware about the body language because the signals that are conveyed by a person’s body language and that can provide a great deal of information to you. Most of the recruiters know, there are approximately 750,000 body language signals, Some of the are much difficult to control. There are 25 body language signals.
Remember, Being able to assertive does not mean just getting your viewpoint across. It is a combination of being able to listen and persuade it. There is much difference between just telling and selling your ideas to each other. It is the most effective manner to build assertiveness skills.
Here a key point is so simple, Learn to “Why did he/she say that??” Find their why and understand it, And you will easily share your ideas to each other. This is the biggest and strong skill that the Assertive person might have.
5. Consider the situation
Before acting or narrating your ideas, you must remember what result you want to achieve in the end. This means in order to communicate effectively and assertively, give yourself time to think and consider the situation that might need to handled.
There is a lovely expression by Chinese proverb;
Take time to think before acting. Real action and super successful results takes time.
6. Plan your response action
Decide When and how you will make it in planning your response step. In this step, you must to think about the issues, Is the Issue you are solving is the most important or not. This is the biggest thing that you should consider in taking to action period.
Don’t just expect the best outcome – mentally prepare for the worse scenario. Remember, I am not emphasized on, Take plan into action with the backup plan but in contrast, I suggest you to take risk means, take your plan to action without any backup plan.
A truly positive thinking person always plans for the best, clearly has in their mind a positive result, but has also looked at the worst possible scenario.
Here, the key point is to prepare mentally to face the worst scenario of your actions.
7. Make your point clearly
Take a deep breath, Generating oxygen in the bloodstreams, relax and make a clear point of what you are saying. Be open and non-defensive. Do not imagine that the other person is tuned in and able to your level of thinking.
In getting your point of view effectively, remember that, to a certain extent, person to person communication is little likey sales process. It’s a Simple aim is to persuade somebody to see clearly the results of what you wish to achieve. The most effective assertiveness skill.
8. Say No nicely
This is the most important assertive skills of an assertive person – being able to say NO clearly to anyone.
Say No friendly, logical and positive manner
9. Be positive
People who communicate with a cheerful and positive expression somehow always seem to get their message across the people. Say something nice, Not creepy – a General compliment. Be willing to give praises to someone and do so enthusiastically.
Remember, If we don’t stand for anything, we will fall for anything.
Being able to an assertive person or acquire assertiveness skills is so easy. You just need to follow the steps that we already discussed above. You just need to see the big picture of the Importance of the assertiveness and follow the basics of assertiveness.
Tell me in the comment section what kind of person you want to be. My suggestions are to be real, be yourself. Live in the present moments and don’t tense on your head and on your belly. It is easy to run when you sleep.